Lego Group makes bid on border wall


In a press conference today in Billund, Denmark, Lego Group spokesperson Sven Jensen announced the Lego Group’s plans to bid on the United States border wall with Mexico. Although some details of the bid remain confidential, Jensen shared that the wall would be made of life-sized Lego Bricks, constructed of a proprietary Kevlar-type material. “Our wall will be strong, but flexible. The interlocking brick  construction  allows for flexibility in adapting to the varying terrain along the border” said Jensen, “along with incredible speed of construction. Since our bricks snap together with such ease, we can use unskilled labor to build the wall, allowing us to save money on construction costs.”

Although some at the press conference questioned the Lego Group’s ability to produce a wall of such scope, Jensen scoffed at the objections. “We’ve been making children happy now with creative and imaginative use of our Lego Bricks since 1932, so why wouldn’t we be able to please the biggest, baddest child of all? ”

© Huffygirl 2017

 

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Canada adds new province


CanadianMapleLeaf

 

Canadian prime minister Justin Trudeau announced today it has acquired enough land to add a new Canadian province in Israel. “Our new province is a positive move for both Canadians, Israelis and  Palestinians. Canada is a country originally formed by peoples of many nations, including Aboriginal people and those from many European nations.  Our hope is that the unity that all Canadians feel will spill over into the new province, uniting Canadians and all people currently living in Israel.”

While details are still evolving, Trudeau believes that all residents will eventually gain dual citizenship of Canada and Israel, while maintaining any citizenship they currently hold from disputed Israeli lands. “This will allow all citizens of the new province to move about freely, dispensing the need for Israeli work permits, which is always a hot button issue in Israel.

The addition of the new province, named Nova Canuck, brings the number of Canadian provinces to 11. While most Canadians are ecstatic about the addition of the new land, some remain skeptical. Disputers argue that Trudeau, who makes his love of the Israeli product SodaStream no secret, has acquired Israeli land to keep his beloved soda flowing. While Trudeau denies this, both Canadian and Israeli Twitter are blowing up over the hashtag #SodastreamsoTrudeau.

© Huffygirl 2016