Local blogger a person of interest in Velveeta shortage

Kraft confirms Velveeta shortage

A spokesperson for Kraft Foods has confirmed they are investigating a person of interest in the recent Velveeta shortage, dubbed “cheesepocalypse.” Says Kraft “Huffygirl, of Huffygirl’s Blog, is a known opponent of cheese in the American diet. Ms. Huffy actually states on her blog page that she is “…waging a one-woman war against cheese. It seems odd that we would develop manufacturing issues in our most popular cheese line, Velveeta, just before the Superbowl, the biggest cheese consumption day of the year.”

Although Huffygirl could not be reached for comment, she issued a statement via her blog. “While I’m flattered that Kraft Foods thinks I am powerful enough to influence their manufacturing process, I confess that I had nothing to do with the so-called cheesepocalypse. Although  I am opposed to the over-consumption of cheese and it’s counterparts, such as manufactured cheese-like food, as is the case with Velveeta, I would in no way attempt to thwart those engaged in the cheese-food industry.” Huffygirl goes on to say “I encourage Americans to take this cheese-food shortage as an opportunity to improve their health by reducing or eliminating their consumption of cheese and cheese-like foods.”

© Huffygirl 2014

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7 thoughts on “Local blogger a person of interest in Velveeta shortage

  1. I love your witty take on this Huffy! As you say in ‘love affair with cheese’ the rubbish in cellophane wrapped slices nears no relation to cheese and goodness knows what that velveeta stuff is! Real cheese bought from an expert, preferably local cheesemaker and eaten in moderation is divine 🙂

    • I’m with you Gilly. Unfortunately, most Americans eat the cellophane wrapped kind, instead of the good stuff. In case you are wondering, Velveeta is a lot like the cellophane-wrapped cheese, only more gooey and artificial. People melt it and mix it with salsa for a dip, of melt it and dip nacho chips in it. I’d sooner dip my food in melted salt.

  2. So, that person I saw with a giant blonde wig and sunglasses, carrying a sign saying “Cheese is the Devil’s food”–that wasn’t you?

  3. Pingback: A wild and crazy guide to Superbowl XLIIMCIV | Huffygirl's Blog

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